As much as I loathed Medieval History fall semester... I still managed to enjoy some of the little gems Theresa Vann liked to throw into casual conversation on a daily basis. Here are some of the most memorable quotes from the Medieval History notebook I found while cleaning through my drawers:


“He hears ‘Love Feast” and he thinks those Christians are down there, having orgies, eating babies.”
(in response to a funky thumping noise heard overhead) “Now they’re dragging a dead body up there I guess”

“Islam spread peacefully. Like a gas. People inhaled Islam and felt peaceful.”

“The Father is butter, the son is MARGARINE. It looks like butter, it tastes like butter, but it’s not butter. And I don’t know what the Holy Spirit is… I Can’t Believe it’s Not Butter…” –On Arianism

“He had red hair, was over 6 feet tall, had big feet, and a big bushy beard which continued to grow after his death. No one messed with Charlemagne”

“It’s the end of the world as we know it…”

“The plague would be a good cause of concern. You know, you turn black and fall over dead. It’d catch my attention.”

“My buddy from grad school once said that psychologists are nice Jewish boys who fainted at the sight of blood.”

:-)